Every year around this time since I started using Tumblr, I go back and read through all of my posts. Cringe at the things I wrote pre-college, laugh at the now insignificant obstacles that I used to stress out about in high school, reminisce about AP tests, piano, Irie’s class, Arizona, yearbook, senior summer, you name it.
Remember.
This time, however, one particular, more recent post stuck out to me:
“I haven’t really used my tumblr all that much. However, now that I’m a ‘responsible’ college student (it still feels weird to say that), I think that I should document my adventures here at UCLA. Of course, this probably means I’ll keep it up for a week and then stop posting after that when midterms roll around. We’ll see what happens.
So here goes.
Things I’ve learned so far:”
Funny how long ago it seems since I wrote that. But I read that list twice today and I was struck by the realization that I’ve learned so many more things since then. It’s crazy how far we can come in seven short months. What a blessing indeed.
11) Recognize God’s sovereignty.
I can’t say it enough. Seriously. God is sovereign. God is absolutely free, free to do whatever He wills to do anywhere at any time to carry out His eternal purpose. I’m not saying it’s an easy idea to grasp. Because it’s not - in fact, I don’t think it’s human nature to understand freedom except in its imperfect forms. I haven’t even begun to fully accept this (nor do I think I ever will), but I can say that just the slightest understanding of God’s sovereignty - or better yet, the realization that I am not humanly capable of ever fully understanding God’s character - has changed my perspective and transformed the way that I live my life. (1 Cor. 8:2-3, Job 11:7-9, Romans 8:28-30)
12) Realize that not everyone is the same as you.
Mindblowing, huh? To be honest, however, I did to some degree believe that everyone thought the same way that I did. That other people would never misinterpret the things I said or mistake what I intended as a funny comment for something malicious. And it went both ways. Since I valued - and still value - words very highly, I’ve lost count of how many times I’ve been hurt when the people I surrounded myself with backed down on their promises or spoke carelessly to me. I’m only just beginning to accept the fact that my friends think in a different way than I do. That they might show that they care in a way that I may not necessarily understand right now. And that it would be selfish of me to fault them for that. (Romans 12:6-8)
13) Be intentional with your time life.
People aren’t lying when they say that college goes by in the blink of an eye. Because it’s true. Freshman year is almost over and it really doesn’t feel like that long ago since I moved into my tiny Dykstra triple in September. That being said, time is precious. Don’t waste it by having mindless conversations, making unintentional friendships, or stressing out unnecessarily about school.
“We waste our lives when we do not pray and think and dream and plan and work toward magnifying God in all spheres of life. God created us for this: to live our lives in a way that makes him look more like the greatness and the beauty and the infinite worth that he really is. In the night sky of this world God appears to most people, if at all, like a pinprick of light in a heaven of darkness. But he created us and called us to make him look like what he really is” (Piper, Don’t Waste Your Life)
What a great quote. Carpe diem… Jesus style. (James 4:13-15)
14) Find an outlet.
College is stressful. And this is coming from someone who probably doesn’t worry enough about grades. But, at least for me, class isn’t easy. Chem definitely isn’t easy. So find a way to deal with it.
I figured out early on during fall quarter that one of the best ways for me to unwind was to search for new music and make playlists. I don’t think a lot of my friends understood why I did it, but it worked. So figure out what activity allows you to escape. Maybe it’s reading, talking, drawing. Whatever it is, do it often. (Matthew 6:25-34)
15) Stay in touch.
This one is particularly hard for me, just because I’m very much an “out of sight, out of mind” sort of person. When I first moved to UCLA, it was so easy for me to discount my high school friends and even the people from FCBC that I no longer saw. So tempting to try to “reinvent” myself and bury my past. But it’s becoming more and more apparent to me how much more I should be valuing these relationships. Because these are the people that have known me the longest, the people that are familiar with who I was and how I acted before I came to UCLA. The people who watched me slip and fall, yet still loved me despite my many faults. (James 5:16)
15) Laugh.
Do it often. It makes things more fun. Trust.
16) Take naps.
Don’t let it bother you when people make fun of you for it. It goes both ways. Don’t bag on someone for having habits that are different than yours - I know that I’m definitely guilty of doing this. If you need sleep, go to sleep. If you do your best work at night, do your work during the night. Know your limits. Know yourself.
17) Take advantage of dining halls.
UCLA has great food. And I love food. But that’s not the main reason why I love dining halls so much. I love how easy and convenient it is to meet up with other people over a meal. How dining halls are one of the greatest excuses to get to know someone better. Make an effort to meet up with people. Have a meal with them. Be open, listen, learn. (Proverbs 27:17, Hebrews 10:24-25)
18) Find steak. Eat it.
Every year when I was in high school, during the first assembly for Sunday School, Byron used to remind us that we weren’t going to be spoon fed any longer. That it was high time for us to learn how to chew on steak instead of mindlessly swallowing baby food (I probably messed that analogy up somewhere). I don’t think I really understood or took that lesson to heart during high school. But I can’t emphasize enough how important it is to seek out spiritual food in college. To find a fellowship where you can be challenged. To question your own beliefs. To not thoughtlessly accept everything you hear as true. To build a solid foundation based not on your peers or your pastors, but on the Bible. (2 Timothy 3:16-17)
19) Stop complaining.
During winter quarter, it was so easy for me to complain about my four classes, my lack of understanding in Chem, or my job and the horrible hours. So easy for me to mention how tired I was as a way to start a conversation with my friends. But it’s a waste of time. I’m starting to realize just how fortunate I am to be here, to be at this school, to be alive. How blessed I am to have been saved by grace and how undeserving I am of God’s love. How insulting it must be to God when we complain - how by complaining, I’m basically telling Him that sending His son to die on the cross for me wasn’t good enough. (Philippians 2)
20) Choose joy.
It hasn’t been as easy as i thought it would be. I went into college with a very skewed definition of joy, equating joy in my mind with happiness. But while happiness is dependent on external circumstances - how sunny it is outside, how well I do on a midterm, joy is not. It’s internal, the byproduct of remaining in God’s love, the serenity of the soul that comes from being in harmony with God, the choice to trust in God’s faithfulness, regardless of circumstance. It’s not so much a feeling, but a conscious decision. Rejoice always, pray continually, give thanks in all circumstances; for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus (1 Thessalonians 5:16-18).
sorry for taking over your dashboard. haha.
Lately I’ve been haunted by a question. I’ll be lying on my bed, trying to fall asleep, rushing to class after leaving my room a few minutes too late, or trying to come to terms with the fact that I’ll be done with my freshman year in a little over a month. And then, without fail, two words will pop into my mind.
What if?
What if I hadn’t decided to come to UCLA? What if I were in Boston right now, packing up my stuff to fly home for the summer? What if my parents hadn’t become Christians before I was even born? What if I hadn’t grown up at FCBC? What if I had chosen cru instead of aacf? What if I had acted differently, spoken more carefully? What if I had said yes?
What if, what if, what if.
And just like that, I’m filled with doubt. Doubt that the choices that I’ve made in life have been wrong. Frightened by the chance that my judgment, logic, and reason may somehow have failed me.
But God, of course, in His perfect timing, constantly reminds me of how utterly wrong and misplaced my fears are.
How prideful I must be if I think that I have the power to change the course of my life. How miniscule, how fickle my faith must be if I can even entertain the possibility that my life could have turned out differently. Because God doesn’t make mistakes.
God doesn’t leave any room for hypotheticals.
“No one can dissuade Him from His purposes, nothing turn Him aside from His plans. Since He is omniscient, there can be no unforseen circumstances, no accidents. As He is sovereign, there can be no countermanded orders, no breakdown in authority; and as He is omnipotent, there can be no want of power to achieve His chosen ends. God is sufficient unto Himself for all these things.”
-A.W. Tozer, The Knowledge of the Holy
I should be ecstatic, comforted by the fact that I shouldn’t be concerned or worried about the trials that i face in my life. Unburdened by the truth that I am not in control now, nor will I ever be. Humbled by the knowledge that someone so great, so powerful, so free as God would care enough about me to have a plan for my life.
“ Remember this, and be assured;
Recall it to mind, you transgressors.
Remember the former things long past,
For I am God, and there is no other;
I am God, and there is no one like Me,
Declaring the end from the beginning,
And from ancient times things which have not been done,
Saying, ‘ My purpose will be established,
And I will accomplish all My good pleasure’;
Calling a bird of prey from the east,
The man of My purpose from a far country.
Truly I have spoken; truly I will bring it to pass.
I have planned it, surely I will do it.”
-Isaiah 46:8-11
No temptation has overtaken you but such as is common to man; and God is faithful, who will not allow you to be tempted beyond what you are able, but with the temptation will provide the way of escape also, so that you will be able to endure it.
Therefore, my beloved, flee from idolatry.
1 Corinthians 10:13-14
“Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will.” Romans 12:2
I’m done.
MEOWOWOWOOW AL;SDJFL;KASJDFL;KAJSDFL;KADFJSJL
YAYYY JENNIFER CHEW!!! :DD
WHAT A BRIGHT BEAUTIFUL BALL OF SUNSHINE!!! TAHAHAHAHHA SHE LIKES OTTERS AND PUPPIES AND KITTENS AND JAYESSLEE AND SONIA AND CARMEN AND LILLIAN TAHAHHAHAHAHHA :DDD
Come and see what the LORD has done, the desolations he has brought on the earth.
He makes wars cease to the ends of the earth.
He breaks the bow and shatters the spear; he burns the shields with fire.
He says,
“Be still, and know that I am God;
I will be exalted among the nations,
I will be exalted in the earth.”
-Psalm 46:8-10
“If you’re living in God’s will for your life, when you run into a problem, that’s not your problem to fix, that’s God’s problem to fix. When you’re living in God’s will for your life and you run into an obstacle, that’s not your obstacle, that’s God’s obstacle. My days are stress-free knowing that.
Being in God’s will doesn’t mean you won’t encounter obstacles or problems in your life. It means you won’t encounter them alone. And when you do, avoid the temptation to say, ‘I got this one, God.’ Instead say, ‘Wow, I’m walking in the path you’ve laid out, and that’s a big obstacle. Good thing I serve an even bigger God.’”
-Jon Acuff
jon: socal is better than norcal
Jonathan Cheong and I just entered our video into a cover contest! the song is “You Have Me”, our testament to the One who stuck it out with us during the trials of the last year… I’d appreciate it if you could watch our video and/or reblog the link! thank you for the love :)
special thanks to…
Sonia Fan for introducing us to AMP and showing us the cover contest
Lillian Le Pham for lending us dangálang the mandolin!
Theo Ma for letting us borrow the cajon without his permission >:)My beloved roommate Daniel and I did a cover of a song quite close to our hearts and we’d love if you guys could support us in this competition that’s based on how many views we get =)
Here’s a reminder to you guys that no matter how silent He seems at times or how far we think we’ve run away from Him, He still has us in his arms and that His love for us and the Gospel are steadfast and unchanging.
To God be all the glory.
“I’ve decided that if I had my life to live over again, I would not only climb more mountains, swim more rivers, and watch more sunsets; I wouldn’t only jettison my hot water bottle, raincoat, umbrella, parachute, and raft; I would not only go barefoot earlier in the spring and stay out later in the fall; but I would devote not one more minute to monitoring my spiritual growth. No, not one.” - Brennan Manning, The Furious Longing of God
When I first read this quote, my first inclination was to disagree with it.
I love Brennan Manning because the things that he says challenge my own opinions (and God knows I have plenty of those).
Because my first impulse is to say that self-evaluation is not only a good thing, but a necessary one. Because isn’t that partly how we grow in God? Don’t we need to have some degree of awareness of where we are spiritually in order to actively work to bring our faith to the next level? Isn’t that at least a part of the reason why church camps, accountability, and fellowships exist?
But what if Brennan is right?
What if what he really means is that we shouldn’t get caught up in the act of constantly improving our “reputation” as Christians. That we should be confident in His love and not question the security of our relationship with Him. That we should stop wasting our time worrying.
To cease striving and know that He is God (Psalm 46:10).
It’s fascinating… and also terrifying at the same time. The idea of being fully present and not one thing more – to be fully present and not analyze our present-ness – to be so present that there’s nothing else to do but enjoy His presence. To be so immersed in the Word and Christ that the thought of gauging our spiritual growth doesn’t even occur to us. To be so sure and confident in our faith that there is no need to question it.
God, I wish I were at that point.
it took college for me to realize how much I freaking love/rely on/can’t live without music.
when I’m stressed out, exhausted, studying, bored, hungry, you name it… I turn to music.
when I became increasingly more stressed out, exhausted, prone to studying, etc. when I got to college, I realized something. Music has a strange way of affecting the way I feel.
I’m not a huge fan of mainstream music (specifically rap), but I make an exception when I work out (in fact, I have a special workout playlist for this purpose alone). Nothing makes me more in the mood to run on an elliptical machine than kanye or eminem. I swear, worship music really doesn’t have the same effect (I tried).
but then I actually looked at the lyrics to what I was listening to. and I was disgusted, to say the least.
I realized that the very reason why those songs are perfect for working out - the fact that they make me feel angry, unworthy, and materialistic - is also the reason why I shouldn’t be listening to them.
because it’s impossible, for me, at least, to simultaneously “flee evil” (1 Tim. 6:11) and be entertained by it.
“The good man out of the good treasure of his heart brings forth what is good; and the evil man out of the evil treasure brings forth what is evil; for his mouth speaks from that which fills his heart.” -Luke 6:45
I always thought the phrase “guard your heart” only applied to relationships. But I can’t pretend that my heart is only susceptible to boys. Nor can I rationalize that I don’t need to control what forms of media I allow to be exposed to my heart. And it comes down to this: Am I putting things in my heart that I don’t want to see in my words or actions?
Honestly, I don’t believe that there’s anything inherently wrong with mainstream music. But I shouldn’t be asking myself, “Is this acceptable?” No, the question I should be asking is, “Will this promote holiness?”
And in this case, definitely not.
